Personally, my daughters routine probably wouldnt work with more children but I know Im not having any more at this point in my life, so it works for us! What do you think are the biggest misconceptions about sleep training? I can only speak to our experience and what has worked for us. Avoid overtiredness by ensuring adequate daytime naps. Our method at Sleep Wise is not traditional cry it out. If you purchase a product through one of these links, you wont pay anything extra, but I will get a small commission, which helps keep this blog going. In order for a floor bed to be the most successful, there has to be a foundation built during the day with your child of healthy boundaries and expectations. We enjoyed a lot of success with the method, but it is certainly not for everyone. Do babies and children just instinctively rest when they need to rest or do they need our assistance? We empower and teach children concepts and responsibilities when they indicate that they are ready. If your child comes out when its sleeping time, you will consistently take them back and remind them of the boundaries and the clock. That is not to say that a child gets a say as to whether or not they are going to bed they dont but rather, if a child feels unsafe going to sleep without a light on, or a parent present, etc, we acknowledge that forcing the child to comply with our (well-intentioned, well-informed) bedtime design can be counter-productive and doesnt occur as empowering to the child. I think I also need to write a post about sleep dependency and how to ease away from it. The times shown below are guidelines for daytime sleep by age. It's not the crying that most gentle parents mind (trying to prevent or stop any crying in a baby or child is not what defines gentle and would be considered manipulative in many people's view but i think this does get misunderstood) it's the belief that you don't leave a baby or child alone while they cry. My top tip is always to be 100% consistent. I love this approach. The average night time sleep needed for most kids up to age 5 is 11-12 hours per night. Please note, this post may contain affiliate links. Thanks for braving this topic, Jennifer its one thats old battleground for mommy wars. Maybe because sleep is something we all so desperately miss from our pre-child lives! Thanks so much for your comment, Joelle! need, floor bed or not. Here are some other tips: There is a ton of controversy around encouraging independent sleep, especially in the Attachment Parenting segment of the parenting population. The studies are poorly conducted and the synopses are heavily biasedand, for a lover of science, difficult to read. It is funny I find that kids who start with no cribs but always an open bed dont have the issues of escaping the bed the same as children in cribs do! Positive praise, reassurance, and a you can do it attitude really help. One thing that I really tried to emphasize in this article and that I have discovered after caring for so many children is that the cliche is completely true every child is different. Thanks for sharing! Youve got this!!! To say that setting a bedtime, after a long day of bonding and love, can cause lifelong brain damage is a hard stretch. Montessori sleep methods can be successful with problem sleepers and easy sleepers, as long as you choose a method that you feel comfortable with and that is a good fit for your childs personality. However, if you find this to be tricky, opting for bedtime might work better since their natural sleep drive is higher at night. My daughter, as well as my 3 year old, will often end up snuggled up to me a couple times a week and I'm totally fine with it. It did involve some crying before sleep, but for the most part, there was minimal fuss or crying before naps or bedtime so long as we properly timed the sleep window like you mentioned, followed his cues, and remained very consistent. Thank you for your comment Im glad it was helpful to you. Then you lay them back down, awake. I understand the struggle with restful sleep. Please note, this post may contain affiliate links. For more details, see our Full Disclosure . I dont necessarily think that its about negotiating bedtimes, its about embracing that children can take a while to fall asleep and providing an alternative to a parent being there throughout the process or providing boundaries, especially if your child is likely to wander out of/around their room for hours after the established bedtime. She generously offers a FREE 15-minute evaluation call so go ahead and schedule your call with her! Could you go into a bit more detail on what your bedtime routine looked like back when you wrote this? I will admit that this was perhaps the most difficult method that I tried there were many times that I was tempted to limit her play or have her put a toy away. You can set your address, phone number, email and site description in the settings tab.Link to read me page with more information. Attachment Parenting is simply an evolution of the Attachment Theory.). 7:28 final kisses, turning on the closet light and sound machine, tucking in her and her doll. Sleep is a necessity for healthy growth and development and I love being able to coach people through that. 7pm -final play in the playroom with a five minute timer on my phone Ive actually experienced tea tree oil poisoning before, so its strangely the one Im most cautious with. More recently, the AAP has come up with some guidelines for floor beds. Required fields are marked *. Self-soothing is just one part of learning how to sleep, but it is the main part of independent sleep. Lol. I want to take a minute to debunk each one of those. In the newborn days its just a gentle repetitive process. Is there a good way to do a sleep training for a 9 mo baby using a Montessori bed? They will also come to know that nights are for sleep and that their loving parents will be in when they are needed. And your husband not fitting into his new family my husband felt the same way, while our daughter was peacefully sleeping in the crib in her very own room. Just found you blog and Im loving it, thanks for sharing! Many parents continue nursing their babies when they wake hungry; needs are not ignored. with a floor bed or toddler bed? There are always going to be principals in any parenting philosophy that we need to look deeper into. I would love to incorporate these more, as I only reach for them when we are sick, but I cant say enough how helpful peppermint oil has been when Ella is congested and trying to sleep. A favorite book is read. Thanks for sharing. Without further ado, here is our interview: Hi Megan! There are many ways parents can make sleep learning easier, however. Thank you for such a thoughtful comment, Lauren! I became a Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant because I love to help people and I saw the benefits first hand, of being a well-rested family. A few of the biggest misconceptions I hear are you have to use cry it out, its stressful for your child, or they wont feel attached anymore. If your little one is getting proper sleep in a bed with the parents, great. Ensure plenty of closeness and bonding happens throughout the day. I also really enjoy what you said about routine offering assurance and instilling confidence and comfort in children. Sleep and Floor Bed Tips with Sleep Consultant Megan Kumpf, her bio on the Sleepwise Consulting website, SIDS and Other Sleep-Related Infant Deaths: Updated 2016 Recommendations for a Safe Infant Sleeping Environment, favorite sleep furniture/gear/decor in this post, Our Toddler's Daily Routine, Montessori Style. As soon as he drifts off, I quietly leave. When people attach the term Montessori to sleep, its often in reference to developing independence around sleep and bedtime. Here is a great sleep chart for ages and times. You can even put an educational spin to it if youre more comfortable spelling out letters and words on your childs hand and having them guess what youre saying.. Making it positive and finding a sleep method you feel comfortable with is key. We loosely follow the play to sleep concept. Your approach helped me understand since we are now considering Montessori for our family. What would you say your mission is? This comment is deleted because its SPAM. At this age carving out some special one on one time during the day can really help your child feel more confident sleeping independently at night. While children can engage in hours of play within them, the rooms themselves should allow for peace and relaxation. If youre not sure which one is right for your family youre welcome to reach out to me anytime for a free evaluation call. I really appreciate your response and getting a sense of some realistic exceptions as to how long this can take. I have a few sleeping posts in the work, and hope I can muster up the courage to post more about cosleeping . Again, as I mentioned above, if your child is already in a crib and youre thinking about this transition, solidifying those independent skills first will make a world of difference. At that point only rocking him in our arms would make him sleep. What would you say are the biggest benefits to a well-rested family? She will most likely come into my room crying around 2, but once shes in our bed shes fine. I know Im mostly lucky with her sleep, but weve put her down the moment she starts getting tired from day one. There are lots of arguments for and against of course but i feel the 'simplicity' of the article evades being honest about a key dividing fact among many sleep trainers vs 'gentle' or attachment' or even RIE parenting styles - that (i assume?) Proper wake times will make it so your baby/child is ready for sleep. I love the concept that bedtime includes choice I guess it does in our home too, but I had never thought of it as so intentional. We turn off lights but he still wants to play with his toys until hes overtired and starts to cry. And we let her stay up another 30 mins or so, but then she goes down again the same way and the 2nd time is always the winner! We havent had any issues with our little one falling asleep, but its good to read these strategies for when the time comes, as she gets older. I would recommend waiting until 6 months and up to introduce a floor bed. Thank you! I guess the tone of your post turned me off. Regardless of where your child sleeps, the room and set-up must be safe. I will admit that Ella took hours to fall asleep when we first embraced this approach (singing and playing until 10pm some nights), but she slowly returned to an earlier bedtime. Reading random comments and anti-sleep-training articles on the internet will have you believe that parents who let their children cry it out at bedtime are throwing their babies in a cold, dark dungeon, promptly at 7 pm every night just so we can drink wine and laugh at their cries. My 10 months old also needs help to sleep. Usually I can give her a kiss, say good night and leave, but sometimes she will insist my hubby or I stay (points next to her bed and says nigh nigh!) And we will. Some children need assistance longer than others, and while it is every parents individual decision, the Montessori way takes into account the needs and preferences of the child; children are not forced to comply with sleeping arrangements or expectations that they are insecure or upset by. Oh, the irony: you take the baby out of the family bed just so your husband could cuddle with you, because he, the grown man, cant handle not being close to his loved one. Our bedtime and nap routines are simple and straightforward, and I agree with you that doing calm things before bedtime is so important. (Some children naturally slow down and eventually give in to sleep, some children will fight til the very end.) Being a well-rested family benefits all areas of life- play, school, and work. Helping your child find theirs is such a gift. My own grandmother told me that as a baby, she was picked up and held by the clock, fed by the clock, and put back in her cot by the clock. Im a mom of 3 and I love those sweet snuggles and individual times with each of my children, but I promise seeing them wake up each morning well rested and happy is a win.

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